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Three Levels of Relationships


We have all heard that the best relationships are composed of two whole and complete individuals coming together as one. It’s a lovely theory, but I don’t know anyone whole and available to date, do you? If we waited until we were healed before we had a relationship, there would be no hope for any of us. I think the best relationships are made up of two people willing to do whatever it takes within that relationship to heal. Then at least we stand a chance.

Relationships are the most important aspect of our lives because it is through another that we come to know ourselves. Anyone can be peaceful alone in a cave on a mountaintop—but in a relationship? That’s where we realize just how crazy-making we really are.

One of my favorite lines from A Course in Miracles is “The ark of peace is entered two by two.” The story of Noah’s ark is a metaphor for how we save ourselves from drowning in the illusion. We arrive at the safe haven of love by bringing another with us. We can’t awaken alone. Even gurus were once disciples.

Under our current hypnotic spell, we appear to live in a chaotic universe of random, accidental meetings. But there are no accidents, even in relationships. According to A Course in Miracles, relationships are assignments. Each relationship is chosen by our higher self for one purpose: To learn that only love is real. In order to accomplish this, we must learn to see one another as God sees us. As we see another, we see ourselves. As we see ourselves, we see another. That is a holy relationship. Thus, every person we meet is a holy encounter because every person carries the potential of awakening us from the dream. The form of each relationship is different, but the content, the underlying purpose, is always the same—to create a holy relationship.

A Course in Miracles says there are three levels of relationships:

  • Level One relationships. Level One relationships are with people we don’t actually know: the man who doesn’t let us merge into traffic or the pushy woman in the grocery line. In our hustle-and-bustle world, they are some of our greatest teachers, catching us off guard while we’re asleep. We think of these meetings as “chance encounters,” but the Course tells us, “Those who are to meet will meet.” Level One assignments are people you seem to know very little about, but, for example, this may be the tenth lifetime in which you’ve spilled a drink on one of them. Whether we label it bad, pleasant, or uneventful, and no matter how brief, each relationship carries tremendous potential for healing. You will continue to meet until your assignment is complete and forgiveness has been found.


  • Level Two relationships. Level Two relationships are most likely, though not exclusively, with friends, lovers, coworkers, and exes. More time is spent in Level Two relationships, offering you a chance for deeper self- examination. Once you enter a relationship, you remain connected through the love you have shared regardless of what happens and even though you may appear to separate when the assignment is over. Often this completion accompanies a feeling of having “outgrown” each other. Or you may simply take a break from the relationship to learn other lessons before you continue healing with that person again. It can also be true that you are never physically with some of these people again in this world. Regardless of the circumstance, the lessons of Level Two relationships can affect an entire lifetime.


  • Level Three relationships. Level Three relationships are lifelong. They are with parents, siblings, children, spouses, and close friends. Lifelong does not necessarily mean amicable. It means there is a considerable amount of karma, so to speak, with these people. Level Three assignments can be extremely gratifying and offer profound moments of love, but they can also be ugly and messy. These people bring out the best and worst in us. I understand these relationships as soul contracts that we form before coming here. Both parties agreed that they would try to learn their lessons of forgiveness through what the other had or didn’t have. The growth potential is nothing short of a quantum leap if we are willing to perceive these people as our teachers in awakening, rather than just “Mom” or “Dad” or whoever.


To heal a relationship is to understand its purpose. In order to learn that, we must step away from our limited perception of seeing another as a body and allow a higher perception to come forward. Hypnotherapy can facilitate this perspective, and subsequently heal distressed relationships, because it has the potential to transport us out of our conscious mind and into the expanded awareness of our superconscious mind. When we shift from body consciousness to spirit consciousness, where all minds are joined, we’re able to perceive that underneath Dad’s rage, for example, is a deep sadness and disappointment because his life didn’t turn out the way he had hoped, or because his father left him when he was a child. That empathy found in hypnosis has a beneficial carryover effect. We become less reactive to what Dad says, or we become clearer about our role in the relationship. We are able to understand that all fear is a call for love. And if we are ready and willing, we can give that love to him simply in our mind and create a healing.




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You’ve probably heard the scientific research in the psychology and medical field that supports hypnotherapy as a powerful tool for lasting change. But did you know it is equally effective for awakening and exploring expanded states of consciousness?

Most people think of hypnosis as a tool for behavior modification, such as losing weight and allaying anxiety, but the practice of hypnosis is much more colorful and deep. Hypnosis dates back to ancient Greece where priests used trance-like hypnotic states in what were known as “healing temples” to bring about physical and spiritual healing for patients.

Shaman, too, have used hypnosis throughout various cultures to bring people to the spirit realm for divine inspiration. And in the last couple of centuries, hypnosis has been a favored tool for earnest Truth seekers and intellectual inner dimension travellers just like us. It only makes sense that enlightenment, peace, happiness, all that you seek is already within. We help you uncover it.